Sunday, July 26, 2015

Sunday Stealing

1. Have you ever had a pen pal?  Yes I have, several.  It was always the same thing.  Get a pen pal, write nicely back and forth several times. Then Have a sleep over with your pal, who also has a penpal.  Write letters together; letter which together make you giggle your pants damp, letters which reveal the real you - the you she would meet should she ever visit.  And then you post it.  And then the letters stop. 

2. What’s your favorite breed of dog?  Springer Spaniel, A springer was the original dogwithnobrain. :-) 

3. Can money buy happiness?  No but it can buy you things to make you happy! 

4. Do you listen to music when you’re down?  Yes I do, ad it always does the trick.  Takes me to another place

5.What is one thing you spend way too much money on?  Mmmm, mmm mmm wool.

6.Can you honestly say you’re okay right now?  No - I'm actually under a councillor just now - I have to go and talk to her once a month, that is just joyous.  Better I talk it out to her though, than murder someone in the street. :-)

7.What was the last thing you spent money on? A dish washer?  I take it you mean something other than groceries. :-) 

8.Is your current hair color mostly your natural hair color?  Ha ha ha ha ha ha h ha No.  Today, I am "Golden brown". Like the stranglers.   Last month I was blonde, this time last year, I was dark, dark brown.  I think I am salt and pepper in real time. 

9.Who have you texted in the last 24 hours?   No one.I like to put my mobile out of reach at the weekend. 

10.Were you in a good mood last night?   Yes, I was.  No alcohol, busy day. All good. 

11.Do you have a reason to smile right now?  Yeah, I'm happy. 

12. How often do you hold back what you want to say?  All the time. Part of the practise of Mindfulness.  Don't say it immediately.  Hold it in, think of the consequences, and then think about saying it again.  If you have thought through the consequences and you feel okay about it, go for it.  

13. Do you think that in the end, everything will fall into place?  Yah, I do. mostly. 

14.Are you currently looking forward to anything?   A week off in September.   Also- A party next week. We are hosting a party for my daughter's 21st.

15.Do you have any TV shows on DVD?  Nope.

Wednesday, July 22, 2015

Voices in My Head

Can you hear me breathing?

Is my breathing annoying you?

Nose... why are you making that noise?  Breathe quieter, you are annoying everyone.

Elvis : It's all in your head babe.

Sunday, July 19, 2015

Sunday Stealing..

      stolen from surveysurveysurvey

1. Do you like your movies and books to be more lighthearted or serious?   Lighthearted.  I like my escapism to be make my heart happy, my mind empty and occasionally my feet tap. 

 2. What’s more important, first impressions or lasting impact?   Lasting Impact …. Although my head is able to determing the lasting impact someone will have on me; It’s not often wrong.

 3. Order these areas of psychological health from what you need the least improvement into what you need the most improvement in: physical, emotional, social, intellectual, environmental, spiritual   :    Social- I don’t need improvement in the social side of this.  I’ve learnt how to fake confidence, and how to make OTHER people feel comfortable in a social situation, Spiritual – I’m at ease with what I believe, and am happy to let other people  believe in whatever makes them happy.  Intellectual, I don’t think I could get any smarter … that doesn’t mean I’m really smart; it means that I’ve learned as much as my brain can cope with and I am happy with that.  Environmental; I’m happy in my environment, is that what that means?   , physical – Physically I need work.  Quite a lot of work.  Ha ha ha;  Emotional – my brain is a bit confused in this area.  Several years of medication balancing one area of my head, confused the other side.   Sorry situation.

4. Do you react appropriately to things and control your feelings?   Ha ha ha – see above.  When I was taking medication I was very controlled and happy.  When I stopped taking the pills, everyone around me needs to take care; I tend to explode with increasing fury.


Do you have stable relationships?   Very; the best.  A patient,kind, caring man who loves me despite my instability

6. Do you need to be in a relationship to feel good about yourself?   Nope.  I’m happy to sit in a corner and watch. 

7. Which is the clearest and most concise, your thoughts, your speech or your writing? Which is the least clear and concise?    My writing.  

8. Are you always trying to learn new things?  Yes. Creative things, knitting, crochet, craft, drawing, sewing, writing.

9. Do you feel at peace?   As much as my busy head will let me.

10. Do you have strong morals and ethics that you believe in and adhere to?   The parables of Thumper.  “If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.”

11. Do you think of the needs of all humanity or just the needs of yourself and those you know?   The needs of myself and those closest to me.  – Might sound selfish, but you know what, if we all took care of ourselves, and those closest to us – people might not be in need of other people. 

12. Do you recycle?   Yes I do. Currently cutting up and stitching my daughters old clothes into a quilt.

13. Are you active in your community?   No  I used to be, but it turns out that if you volunteer for one thing – everyone expects you to volunteer for everything. 

14. Are you sensitive to the needs of others?   Yes.  But try not to react all the time. We ALL need time for ourselves. 

15. Do you dress up to go out?   Ha… my idea of dressing up probably isn’t the same as you.

16. What could make you lose respect for someone?   Lying.  Pure and simple; I someone lies to me, nothing left. 

17. If you won $1,000 every week until you die, would you still go to work?  Yes, part-time 

18. What trend has been getting on your nerves lately? adverts!   Moneysupermarket What is that all about (UK only folks)

19. Do you forgive yourself when you make a mistake?   Always.  Mindfulness!! Always. 

20. Is ignorance really bliss?   For some yes.   If I don’t know  I get agitated. 

21. What can be described as ‘even better than the real thing’?  A sunset over the sea on a warm night, with a pink sky and someone you love by yourside.

22. What’s in your wallet right now?   MONEY

23. Do you write letters that you never send?  Nah, I send letters. 

24. Do you ever get the feeling people are laughing at you?   If I did, I would be even more paranoid than I am now.  Are they?????

25. Who’s the one person you’d like to drop a house on?  There are two of them currently.    They are in the Scottish Press,  I’m not giving them a name check, because they are publicity hungry , knob headed twats. 

Do You Believe in Love after Love?

The original was posted here

Have you noticed that I haven't posted about migraines lately? 

I haven't posted about them since August last year, because in August last year, they stopped happening. 

What miraculous thing happened to stop that blight which was probably a week of difficult behaviour building up to a migraine, a day lost to pain and blindness followed by a day feeling as though I had been kicked in the head? 

I stopped taking medication for another problem.  

Yes, for 10 years I have been taking medication which although did the trick in other areas, had been blighting me and costing me at least 3 days a month, every month.    

It was only as the doctor tried to convince me that re-starting the medication I had stopped taking, that I made the association - as soon as I started a new dose - head fuzz. 

And then one of the doctors said "oh yes, that can be an associated side effect. 

I've considered long and hard, and I've decided to not restart it - I'm enjoying the clarity I feel in my head, and of course the lack of pain.  On the down side, I'm slightly of kilter in other areas.   But as my virtual friend told me (and this is a real person, not a voice in my head), told me - if I wasn't a bit bonkers I wouldn't be me. 


Sunday, July 12, 2015

Sunday Stealing -

I Want To Be Famous Meme

Stolen from: Surveysurveysurvey

1. Would you like to be famous? In what way?   Would I?  Hmm?   If I wasn't me I think.   As me, I prefer anonomity - I like to watch people,not be watched; and there's always the danger that as a famous person you say the wrong thing... in the wrong pleace, at the wrong time. 

Image result for obama sings2. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?   Nope.  I don't make that many telephone calls. I like to use email for EVIDENCE!!!

3. What would constitute a “perfect” day for you?   Today, was pretty perfect.  We got up late, I didn't have a hangover (I had the first one in forever on Saturday and that kind of spoilt Saturday);  We went to mum's and helped demolish a shed.  Si hit me on the head with a plank and he kissed it  better.  We came home, and I did the garden, and painted the window ledges.  We had coffee and cake in the garden and did some home baking for our Nant; whose 86th Birthday is tomorrow!  Then we had the perfect Roast dinner - my husband knows how to cook...  and now we are feet up on the couch..  enjoying the last of the weekend.

4. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?   I sing quite a lot.   To myself, to anyone who is passing.  My last singsong though was just after I spotted Obama singing Amazing Grace - that' s my party piece... and so I gave it laldy a lot that day :-) 

5. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?  My mind,.. definitely my mind.   My 30 year old body isn't much to talk about any ways ha ha ha

6. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?   I don't even want to jinx by saying.

7. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?   That I have a husband who adores me.  and children who tolerate me, and appear to love me. 

8. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?  I am what I am as a result of my upbringing.  People seem to quite like me, so no I won't change it. 

9. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?   The ability to be calm, and no have panic attacks.

10. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?   How happy are my children? 
Image result for crystal ball
11. What does friendship mean to you?   A lot.  Especially one who is barking mad, but makes me LAUGH out loud LOTS. 

12. What roles do love and affection play in your life?   A massive role.   A hug and a kiss and a "i love you" makes every day easier. 

13. When did you last laugh?   This afternoon.  My husband hit me, accidentally with a plank, I needed a plaster.  My new dad said I looked like a fanny. 

14. Are you a morning person or a night owl?   Morning I think (once I get up).  I'm a sleepy person. I like sleep 

15. Seen anything weird lately?  You know what, we have... but it was me and Tooli, in the car, and we drove past, and both of us took a double take... but guess what?  I can't for the life of me remember what it was. 

Stolen from: Surveysurveysurvey

Monday, July 06, 2015

It's been a Long time....

Last week, I took a post-work trip to Edinburgh.  It took 2 hours in the car (it would have been shorter, but for the rush hour traffic); I was meeting up with some friends I knew, and have met, and also a friend who I have never met. 

Tooli (Daughter) dropped me off and she headed to meet up with her mate; I bimbled along the street to where I knew they were waiting. 

The one friend, whom I have never met, was sitting at the edge of the table and as I approached, she turned round, looked at me and squealed "OH MY GOD It's Helen". 

The internet is a terrifying thing.  For four years we have ribbed each other, laughed at photos, been thoughtful and sad about things, but we had never laid eyes on each other, other than in photographs.  

She seen me,and knew it was me immediately and the minute I sat down, I wasn't sitting with a stranger, I was sitting with a friend who I had shared stories with, laughed, and cried with.  There was no strangeness and no awkwardness.    Weird eh? 

Our short time together was full of laughing and almost crying with laughter, and too soon we had to head our separate ways again. 

As I walked along the street, I looked at the mass of people in the street, laughing, playing, kissing, holding hands, I looked at the beggars taking up their "prime evening" seats and holding their cups out.  And I contemplated the strangeness and unfairness of the world. 

I noticed one disheveled chap place cardboard down carefully, away from the thoroughfare, and layer torn material on top and the settle himself down carefully.  He wasn't on the busy part of the road, nor on a part of the road which might be busy and he certainly wasn't looking around for a would be benefactor. 

I never give money to beggars; typically because the ones around here are junkies, alcoholics, and people on the make for an easy buck.  

I object to having worked my whole life while they choose to sit on the ground and just ask to have money given to them.   I made that decision years ago when, after having spent 10 hours away from my 7 week old baby, I was shouted at for being a selfish git by a drunk beggar who had been sitting in the same place when I arrived for work, and was still sitting, sodden with piss when I went back to get on my bus home and he gave me a mouthful of abuse and swearing for not acknowledging him. 

But something about this chap made me think.  He wasn't playacting for anyone.  He was looking for a quiet spot to sit down and sleep, maybe think, maybe be alone.  As I walked along the quiet part of the road towards him, I went into my bag and checked what change I had.  I found a note, and thought about it for a moment.  And then I decided. 

I took the note out and diverted towards him.  He looked up at me, aware that someone was coming in his direction and he moved his cardboard in, not wanting to take up more space than was necessary.  As I got closer I held out my hand.  He looked up at me again, and looked at my hand, and then back at my eyes. 

"Take it", I said, and as well as taking my money, he held my hand, in both hands; the warmest hands I had felt; and said "thank you ma'am, thank you very much".  

I refrained from saying "don't buy booze, don't buy drugs".  It wasn't for me to say that; I had made the decision to give him the money - it was up to him to do the right thing. 

As I walked away, I glanced back at him, and he was sat, holding the note in his hand, looking at it, and then he glanced up at me, nodded and put the money inside his jacket. 

I hope he spent it wisely.