Thursday, December 30, 2010

Water Water Everywhere, and not a drop to Drink....

Day 7 without water.  And it feels like week 7.

How for granted do we take water?  Too much!

The pipes are frozen, outside and underground.  We've had a thaw now for at least 5 days, but still no sign of water.  Despite showering at Mum's and having a boundless supply of water in drums, we still feel dirty and unwashed. 

Do you even realise how often you wash your hands during the day?  Or maybe we are all just a bit OCD?

Monday, December 06, 2010

Bells Will be Ringing...

Yes, I left you all alone, for over a month.  November was spend partaking in NaNoWrimo, which I successfully completed, alongside all my other bits and general living.  50,000 in one month, it was like an exorcism - I vanquished hundreds of ghosts from my mind.

I think maybe next time, I will write an actual story, not stories of me.

A plot, a plot is what I need.  Any suggestions?

Friday, October 29, 2010

Listen to the Rhythm of the Falling Rain

Am sitting here in the dark and the warmth of the house, listening to the rain and the wind howl outside. 

Beloved is away to Scouts, and Tooli is away up to Glasgow to see a film.   I'm doing house work, (or at least I like to pretend to myself that I am). 

The weather forecast contains a warning of "persistant rain" which may fall up to 2 inches during the spell.  I think that has already fallen - the road up to the traffic lights was flowing with water, and that was uphill!

It's 29th October. Only a couple of days until I start writing!  50,000 words in a month..... Will I get there?   

I'm gonna Go Out, and Get Myself, Absolutely Pouring Wet......

I have a duvet day today.  

You have no idea how much this means to me!  I woke at 6, went for a pee, and then came back to bed. 

My beloved brought me a cup of coffee, which I drank over the course of 4 hours
I fell asleep again, and had the BEST Biffy Clyro dream EVER. 

Now I'm sitting here, contemplating shower, and then a wee walk round to say hello to my cousin before she takes off the sunny Isle of Man again. 

Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Listen with your Eyes, Listen with your Eyes

Is that right?

Listen with your Eyes?  I seem to remember singing that at ballet when I was 3.

So, countdown until 50,000 in a month.  I think I have a plan now!.  I do!

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Everybody's Doing a Brand New Dance Now

Except me!  I'm knackered. 

It was a birthday for my beloved yesterday and he wasn't impressed.  We decided to let it go, with the exception of Lunch.  We don't go out much, or do anything much anymore so we thought that would be a bit of a present in itself. 

Lunch commenced at 115pm.  Lovely. Lido.  Mussels, Garlic Bread, Calamaris, Soupy Loupy, Thai Chicken, Thai Pancakes, Fish and Chips, Ice Cream, Ice Cream Sundae, Macaroons, and Delux Hot Chocolate.  And Cocktails, and Wine, and Beer, and More Cocktails, and MOre Beer. 

Gran took Toolibell home before Mum and Dad started embarassing themselves.  She had volleyball and had some homework too. She is so diligent, I have NO idea where we got her. 

Cocktails were lovely. I had Rasberry Ripple, JellyBelly, and then moved to my favourite, Cosmopolitan.   We discussed everyone with in sight, and sniggered at our memories of how we ran bars.   We talked over our dream of a caravan park in France and wondered, maybe.....

We decided about 7 we better start to head.  And made it as far as Dan McKay's.  I was freezing. It had actually been sleeting while we were in Lido.  Although it wasn't sleeting any more, it was still bitter.  

Dan McKay's satisfied me with a Jack Daniels and Coke, and then Si and I decided that a trip to Morrison was called for!  Mmm. Quite how we managed to get round the shop and out in one piece is beyond me. I'm not even that sure what we bought!  Tee Hee. 

Still we got home.  I drunk about 5 cups of coffee, went to bed, got up at 12, drunk some water, got up at 3 had a painkiller and more water.  Got up at 5 had more water, then got up at 8 and headed in to work, by which Time I wasn't really too bad. 

All in all, it was a lovely day.  And It would have been nice if Boy had been there too - but we got a big chat with him on the Skype Web Cam which was grand.  He was most impressed to see his mam and da pished as farts smiling down the camera to him!


Sunday, October 17, 2010

Sunday Stealing, Up with the Lark...

Do you like someone?  I like most people.

The last song you listened to?   Toolibelle singing "bad romance".  Or was it me?

What time of day were you born?   Evening.  7ish.

What’s your favorite number?   6, or 4,  or 8,  or 2,  or 10. (all in that order)

Where did you live in 1987?   Hmm, Edinburgh, the Troon, then Glasgow.

Are you jealous of anyone?   Nope.

Is anyone jealous of you?   Probably.

Where were you when 9/11 happened?  Sitting on the Couch, which was where the TV is now.  Off work with depression. Went back to work the next day, never had another day of depressed again.

What do you do when vending machines steal your money?  Kick it really hard. And then complain loudly.

Do you consider yourself kind?  Too kind probably.

If you had to get a tattoo, where would it be?
  RSF on my wrist

If you could be fluent in any other language, what would it be?  Latin

Would you move for the person you loved?  Absolutely. To the end of the earth

Are you touchy feely?  Yes

What’s your life motto?  Live, Laugh and Love - always like no one is watching!

Name three things that you have on you at all times?  iPhone, Knickers, Pink Swiss Card

What’s your favourite town/city?   Edinburgh

What was the last thing you paid for with cash?  New Shoes for Si today.

When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper  mailed it?   Last week, to my boy.

Can you change the oil on a car?
  ha ha ha ha Nope.

Your first love: what is the last thing you heard about him/her?    I'm married to him.

How far back do you know about your ancestry?    1720

The last time you dressed fancy, what did you wear and why did you dress fancy?
As in Fancy Dress  - My Son's Girlfriend, as she would look in 30 years time.   Or dressed fancy:  For a wedding.

Does anything hurt on your body right now?  My Hips?  I've got slight Arthritis, and the wet makes it ache.

Have you been burned by love?   Burned by infatuation. Never knew love like this before.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Aw, Come on, these Feelings

It's been a while since I just wrote.   I had a funny experience today.  A good one, but a strange one, and I know there are stranger things in heaven and earth. 

You know sometimes you have a craving for something, and eventually you get to fulfil that craving.  Well today I did that.  And the outcome was far better than I ever expected.  Far, Far better. 

Monday, October 11, 2010

Such a Feeling's Coming over me!

I love my blip I do, but sometimes there is more to be said.  I felt a bit guilty about part of it, but it was all true. 

Everyone seems to have loved it. I'm never sure what is going to go down well on Blip.  The weirdest photo can attract the fewest comments and views, the simplest one.... and there was nothing spectacular about that one.... can attract loads.

I'm really enjoying the writing part of it though, and it is because of that, and because of chatting with other Blippers and Twitters, that I'm entering the NANOWRIMO Competition. Write a Novel in a Month!  What about that then!  I've got til the end of October to figure out what to write it about, any suggestions?

Sunday, October 10, 2010

In Your Eyes

Am listening to my daughter, trying desperately to arrange a sleep over in Edinburgh....

I feel at 16, her and her friends are old enough and sensible enough to be trusted to go over to the other side of the country and enjoy themselves!

Other parents don't have the same opinion.  I feel desperately for her.  They so want to go.  
Do I give my children too much freedom?  

Sunday Stealing..... It's A Climb.....

1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?  Shit, but I look like Jennifer Anniston.

2. How much cash do you have on you?    
Nothing.  I put everything I had in the "jar".

3. What’s a word that rhymes with DOOR? 
Floor! Doh!

4. Favorite planet? 
Venus.  It's blue. I like Blue

5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell phone?  
Si, my husband, He phoned me four times, and I missed every single on of them!

6. What is your favorite ring tone on your phone?  
Adam Sandler, Grow Old With you...

7. What shirt are you wearing?  
A rather Attractive sleeveless number from Sainsbury which I bought for £3.00 in a sale.

8. Do you label yourself? 
With Stickies?   With Post it Notes? 

9. Name the brand of the shoes you’re currently wearing?   
Asics, cause I am dead fit.

10. Bright or Dark Room?  
Right now, it is REALLY bright, but I like dark.

11. Did you do anything to celebrate John Lennon's 70th yesterday? 
No I did not. I hated the Beatles.  The most over-rated piece of piss in the world.  Sorry Beatles Fans.

12. What does your watch look like?  Hmm, It's a Rolex. So it is a bit Bling

13. What were you doing at midnight last night?  
I was sleeping.  I am a sleepy Burger.

14. What did your last text message you received on your cell say? 
"Just Walking to the House", from my daughter, wondering where she be!

15. Where is your nearest 7-11?   
About 200 yards away round a couple of corners.  we call them "SPAR" here.

16. What’s a word that you say a lot? Bugger Bollocks.

17. Who told you he/she loved you last? 
My Honey.

18. Last furry thing you touched?  
My Pussy - Beau.

19. How many drugs have you done in the last three days? 
Quite a lot!  Co-Codamol, Diazepam, Dicolfluzac, and.... HRT.  - That really wasn't what you were asking was it?

20. How many rolls of film do you need developed? 
None.  does anyone have rolls of film any more.

21. Favorite age you have been so far?
Someone asked me this already today!  38.  That is my best age. Infact., no I change it. 28.  No , 34.  because I love both my kids, and when I was 34 I had them both.  I also like 42.  Because that is a GOOD number.

22. Your worst enemy?  
Hmmmmmm.  The husband's ex.

23. What is your current desktop picture (extra points if you post it.)?  
Is a beautiful picture of my Husband flying a kite today - I just changed it specially for you.

24. What was the last thing you said to someone?   
Who?  Who Is It?  (My husband's phone rang.  I'm the only person who phones him, so I was confused.

25. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to fly what would it be? 
Oh Flying easy!  Cause if I could fly, I could fly away from the bank when I rob it!  Simples.

Up thru the Atmosphere....

today was too beautiful a day to stay indoors. 
Today was a day for the beach and the kite. 
Today was a day for being alive!

Sunday, September 19, 2010

Sunday Stealing..... 19 September 

1. At what time of your life were you happiest and why?
Am pretty damn happy right now!  Daughter is doing grand at school and in sport.  Husband is employed, enjoying Scouts and still kisses me every day.  Boy is In USA becoming an American Boy.
2. Where and when did you meet the love of your life?
Pebbles night club, in Troon 23rd August 1986.
3. Favourite item of clothing ever or most treasured possession?
A 1940 vintage swing coat I bought from Ebay for £20.00.  Cashmere and lambswool, black.  The most luxurious glorious thing I own. 

4. Must-have makeup or beauty item?
Facecream for dry skin
5. What do you think is your worst vice or fault .. honestly?
Spending money.

6. Would you tell your friend, if you knew her husband/wife was cheating on her/him?

7. What ambitions, wishes or desires, for your life, do you still hold close to your heart?
To have enough money to make sure my son stays at college in USA and ensure my daughter goes to the University of her choice. 

8. Where do you see yourself five years from now?
Still forking out for my kids education!
9. If you had the choice of any talent with the penalty that you would lose a talent in exchange, what would you want to gain, and what would you be willing to loose?
I would love to be able to play the piano loosing the ability to eat as much as I can without feeling sick!

10. Name three things that you do want completed in your life before retiring?
I want to travel to America to see my son graduate.   
I want to Sit in the Posh seats at Oxford and see my daugher become a doctor. 
I want to sit on a white sandy beach with my husband and raise a glass to 50 years together.  

11. Of all of the people out there who would have been your fantasy date? Date, not romance...
Christofer Lambert!

12. Google put another spell on you, you have just changed genders for 48 hours... what are you going to do with your 2 days?
Going to show my son and Husband how not to shake their bits dry without splashing the wall.  Going to use monkey bars, (cause I hope my upper body strength would have improved).  Going to laugh raucously at a bar, while drinking pints,and not have people glare at me! (People don't like loud women in bars, drinking pints).

13. If you owned your own island, and got to make it your own country, what would you call it? And why?
Ourland  Because it would be.
14. If you rubbed the lamp and got 3 wishes, what would they be?
1. To be slim and healthy.
2. To be wealthy.
3. To always be happy.
15. What is your earliest memory of puberty?
The horror of hiding bloody pants!

16. If you got banished to your Island alone and could only bring 5 things, what would they be.
Crosstitch, by Diana Gabaldon
Face Cream

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Every day, Every Hour We Share...

Name something you dislike about the day you’re having?
This wee soul is getting buried today.  His name is Ashley and he died of Neuroblastoma.  Not enough is done in this country to research and look for treatment or cure.  I hate this about this day. 

What's the longest that you have committed to one person and one person only?

24 years?  1986 til now.... 2010.  Yup. One person.  That is more than half my life.   He has me all.

What’s the first thing you did when you opened your eyes today?  Picked up my Iphone to see if My Boy had added any updates during my sleep time!

Has anyone ever told you they never want to ever lose you?
Yes, see number 2 above.  Loves me unconditionally, which is quite a difficult thing to do.

Could you go out in public, looking like you do now?
Compared to most days I look quite presentable. Yesterday for example I almost drowned walking round to work!  Hair was everywhere.  Due to the weather I've given up even trying to do something spectacular with my hair.

Do you believe that you never know what you got until you lose it? Yes.  My dad kept telling us that he was better off dead to us, then he died, and we realised just how poorly off we were without him.

Wednesday, September 15, 2010

Assured My Love Is Strong

When boy left, he said "first two weeks will be like holiday, second two weeks, i'll be getting involved in school, and using my brain, fifth week, then I'll start to realise I'm not coming home".

It is the fifth week now, and I don't know about him, but I'm starting to realise that he isn't coming home.  I miss my boy hugs!  One thing that boy could do was hug his mum.  I envy anyone near him in the US when he is in the mood for hugs!

I look at new photos daily, and I see my boy growing stronger, and browner, and more happy by the minute.  It was definitely the right thing for him to do.

But my friend Helen was right.  There is such a thing as empty nest syndrom.  Am so glad I have Toolibelle to squeeze tight still.  She aint going no where, not at least for 2 years.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Red Roses Too, I see them Bloom, for me and You

Scotland has at least 4 seasons in every day.

I set out this morning, buffeted by the gale, and waiting a downpour as the sky was as black as it could be.

As I reached the station, I turned and caught the sunrise. It was amazing.  It just got better and better and better.

Now I'm safely tucked in the office, the wind is howling outside, and every 40 minutes or so there is a downpour to wash away any remaining cobwebs.

I expect the sun to be shining within the next 20 minutes.   Maybe a little hail later.

Wednesday, September 01, 2010

A Million Faces Pass Me By

Boy has been gone for 19 sleeps and life in the Cruse Household has settled into a nice holding pattern.

Tooli runs about like a demented teen - from Hockey, to Volleyball, to the Bedroom to study.  When the phone rings, we leave it, it's going to be for her.  Si and I bimble out to work, bimble back in, drive Tooli where she needs to go, and keep one eye on Skype at all times.

When we see his name blink up on the screen, either one of us are there in a flash.  It doesn't need to be long, just a quick "Hiya" "How you doing?", and he can go again - back to chatting with his old friends, or playing around with his new ones.

He's found his place in this world.  I think my boy was born to be an All-American College Kid.  He's fitting right in there.  Country and Western Concert at the weekend, driving trucks and abusing folk who chew tobacco.   He's made some great new friends and the photosgraphs look amazing.  He looks so comfortable and at home with these shiney new folk - I'm not worried at all.

The Hurricane, however is another matter.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Everybody's high on consolation

But I'm fine!

I knnew that once he was away, everything would settle.  What I wasn't ready for was the loss felt by his dad!  He is visibly missing his boy more than I realised he would.  The delight in his face when he was able to speak and see him on Monday night on Skype was amazing, and that made me sniff just a little bit more than anything else.

His wee sister too is missing him something awful.  They might have fought while they were together, but i think it was just their way of showing their love!

Am I too hard? 

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

The Sum of All Fears

Boy is becoming hyper with excitement.

I am becoming hyper with panic.

Beloved is retreating into himself.

Tooli is coming into her own.

I wish I could breathe easily.

After Friday, I'm sure I'll be fine.

Monday, August 02, 2010

When you find that you're always waiting

The train journey to work is always an interesting one.  I have three carriages to choose from, and each of those carriages is broken in to two.

I recognise daily the regulars who get on my train, and they all have their particular egress and exit points.  I like to throw a bit of a spanner in the work, by changing doors occassionally.

People always sit firstly in a section by themselves, secondly in a section opposite, with one other person, and only if pushed, in a section beside someone.  

I took my crochet today, and focussed on that.  People tend to watch the crochet and not me, so I can look at them.  This morning, a wee chap who I knew was focussed on me, was sitting across the aisle from me, when I glanced over, it wasn't my crochet he was watching, but me. I just smiled and he went all agitated and itchy.  People are discomforted when you catch them watching you. 

People are actually discomforted when you speak directly to them, and they don't know you.  I'm constantly speaking to people I don't know because I feel there is a statement to be made.  "bloody noise", "bloody kids", "gorgeous weather", "beautiful baby".  Nothing more than that. One thing I have noticed, elderly people, as soon as I start speaking look terrified and horrified, when they realise that I'm passing the time of day, and not screaming at them, or slandering them in any way, the appreciate and joy that comes over their face is a joy. 

Try talking to people you don't know.  It'll make them happy.

Friday, July 30, 2010


I think everything bar the packing is done.

It's very strange getting used to thinking about life without Boy.

Everything about him is larger than life, the height, the voice, his actions.  He is possibly the loudest person I know, but also the most loving.

It's going to be very quiet for a while once he is gone.

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

It's Just the Way it is...

A mark of how life is moving on.

Boy is heading off to America in less than 3 weeks.   My baby boy.

One side of my heart is so proud of him, envious even, of the opportunity that he is getting.  A new country, new people, new friends, training, travel,learning; it is mind exploding. 

The other side of my heart is sad.  It isn't broken, I just know that this is the point we, my husband and I have worked towards.   Making a human being so confident in himself, that he is able to take this step, and move away, so very, very far away and start out on his own.  I'm proud that we achieved what we promised ourselves as we felt Betsy Bump move.  A friend, a son to be proud of, and a confident adult who we know won't let us down.

How he will fare is anyone's guess.  He will be playing his sport, Volleyball which he loves, and getting the chance to travel length and breath of North America's to do so.  He will be studying English.  I hope that I can encourage him to blog, because I know that his learning and travels along side his humour will make for the best reading.

I'm not blogging as much these days, because I'm blipping.    But I will try.

Someone else might find the experience useful.

Sunday, July 11, 2010

Sunday Stealing..... Anything to avoid what I'm supposed to do!

Sunday Stealing: Meme Of Many Odd Questions, Part One 
Cheers to all of us thieves!
1. First thing you wash in the shower?   

My Hair

2. What color is your favorite hoodie?

I don't have a hoodie. I am middle aged.  I do however wear my son's hoodie which is grey.  I love it.

3. Would you kiss the last person you kissed again?   

Oh I would indeedy. Is my beardie husband.

4. Do you plan outfits?   

-  Ha ha ha. no. Although Yesterday I did buy a pair of trousers, and a top which actually match!  I didn't buy them to  go together though.

5. How are you feeling RIGHT now?   

- Tired. I like my bed. I should really go.

6. What's the closest thing to you that's red? 

"startled by my furry shorts"  A book.

7. Tell me about the last dream you remember having? 

-  I met a vampire - I had just started reading Eclipse, I am so behind the times. I read the book after the film comes out, and about a year before I'll see it on DVD.  The vampire did not bite me, but made me cut a line in my leg, which he pressed a similar line on his opposite leg to.  Very sensuous!

8. Did you meet anybody new today?   

Nope.  I met no one. But yesterday I met a friend I haven't seen for ages, over a year.  It was nice to chat to her.  When you have old friends you can flip back in to chat like you never haven't missed them.

9. What are you craving right now?   

I am craving a cup of tea.

10. Do you floss?  

Yes I do, probably not as often as I should be most certainly. I have a fear of my teeth falling out. And dentist said floss would help stop that,

11. What comes to mind when I say cabbage?  

tooliebelle, and cabbage farts.

12. Are you emotional?  

Very. I have pills to make me less so.

13. Have you ever counted to 1,000?   

Yes. frequently.  I work with numbers.

14. Do you bite into your ice cream or just lick it?   

Lick.... It's not a biteable thing.

15. Do you like your hair?  

Yus.  Except that it is grey, and I have to dye it constantly.

16. Do you like yourself?   

I do.  very much.   I try to be as good a person as I can be, but the thing I like the most, is that I am surrounded by people I like!

17. Would you go out to eat with George W. Bush? 

ha ha ha  -  I don't think I'd ever have occassion, but if he was buying, yes of course.

18. What are you listening to right now?  

Holland V Spain, World Cup Final.

19. Are your parents strict?  

- Only one left, and the other has retreated into second childhood - I have to dscipline her!

20. Would you go sky diving?  

No. If an accident should happen, I would hate to be responsible for killing a cow.

21. Do you like cottage cheese? 

I do. especially if it has pineapple in it.

22. Have you ever met a celebrity?   

Yes.  I have met, (1) The Queen.   (2) Sean Connery (3) a band from the 80's  (4) Politicians

How Could I Live?

All is good in the Dogwithnobrain world now.

I have all my family around me.  Boy is home, Girl is in Bed. Beloved is home from camp.


Friday, July 09, 2010

I want the Happy Ever After......

Friday 5  : Read, Copy and Answer, and Link back to

In the fairy tale of your life, who is the knight in shining armor?
My beloved, my husband. He is my knight, and always, always protects me and saves me, and always loves me.  Totally. 

In the fairy tale of your life, who is the evil villain?
The Bank Statements.  There is never enough money for everything.

In the fairy tale of your life, who is the loyal, comedic sidekick?My Kids.  Both of them.  They are the sunshine in my heart. They make me smile when no one else can.  They are funny and beautiful and fill my heart.

In the fairy tale of your life, what comes right after “Once upon a time…?”
The girl met her Sailor, and he came back.  And they lived, happily ever after.
In the fairy tale of your life, who is the fairy godmother?
My Mum, who always has the answers and the solutions to what might appear to be the worst nightmare. 

Thanks for participating, and have a happily ever after weekend!

Monday, July 05, 2010

Liar Liar Your Pants are On Fire

I joined a company based on the fact that their name stood for my one true belief.  Honesty, and integrity and everything you do.

I believe that, and if you don't that I find it hard to reconcile the two.

Friday, July 02, 2010

Sunday Stealing, or a Friday 22

Cheers to all of us thieves!

1. What curse word do you use the most?  

Buggary Bollocks

2. Do you own an iPod?  

Yes, Shuffle and Iphone

3. What person do you talk to on the phone the most? 


4. Do you still remember the first person you kissed?  

 Yes, yeuk.

5. Do you remember where you were on 11/9/01?  

Sitting on the couch watching the tv. Off work for the first time with Depression.  Watching events unfold, I realised life could never be THAT bad.  Went back to work the next day. Have never needed a day off work for depression again.

6. What was the last movie you watched?

Karate Kid, Jaden Smith and Jackie Chan.
7. Has anyone ever called you lazy?Me..
8. Do you ever take medication to help you fall asleep?Yes.
9. Has anyone told you a secret this week?pression again.
10. What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?Eyes....
11. What are you looking forward to?Boy getting to USA.
12. Do you own any band t-shirts?Nope.
13. What will you be doing in one hour?Accounts.
14. Is anyone in love with you?Yes.
15. Last time you cried?Karate Kid, Sunday Jaden Smith, and Jackie Chan, (No I haven't copied and pasted, that is when I cried. .
16. Are you on a desktop computer or a laptop?Computer.
17. Are you currently wanting any piercings or tattoos?Yes. want a wee wrist tattoo.
18. Would you ever date anyone covered in tattoos?Nope don't think so my husband would kill me.
19. What were you doing before this?Accounting.
20. When is the last time you slept on the floor?Does floor of tent count? .
21. How many hours of sleep do you need to function?16.
22. Do you eat breakfast daily?
Nope sorry.

Tuesday, June 29, 2010

Never Say Never.

On Sunday, a rare treat - not so much going to the Cinema, but going to the Cinema with my Husband, Son and Daughter. 

Filmfirst had graciously provided tickets and we gladly received them, for a respite from the football!

I loved the original, "wax on, wax off", and I completely love Jackie Chan, so I went with happy heart.

And happy heart it remained.  Despite the cinema being full to bursting, we managed to get seats together, up top. We missed the first five minutes, but thanks to back writing and dialogue we were easily able to pick up the reasons for the move to China.

Jaden Smith is one wee cool dude.   You like him from the moment the camera is on him.   The mother, sadly, could have been re-cast with someone a little less "full-on".  Maybe Jada Pinkett-Smith?   She was not in it so often, and maybe she was just making the most of her limited dialogue, but she could have turned it down a notch or two.  That was the only bad bit of the film.

China was represented beautifully, the gardens, the people, the markets, the old, the new. 

The story built brilliantly, with Dre being bullied, viciously  by the lads from the (bad) Kung Fu School.  Mr Han, appeared slowly, his character building to the saddest scene in the broken car in the living room.  Tears were streaming down my face!

The fight scenes at the end were amazing.  These kids, knew their stuff, and I loved the fact that the little lad ordered to hurt Dre looked so wonderfully shameful.  I loved that they realised their mantra to date had been wrong, but I was sad that it took Dre getting severely beaten to achieve that.

A wonderful, wonderful film. Could be shown along side the original and although each has it's own merits, both will stand the test of time on their own.

Monday, June 21, 2010

What's That Coming over the Hill???

I have regressed. 

I watch Dr Who with my heart in my mouth.

I watched it twice this weekend, and was still as excited.

I'm 46.  I'm exceptionally sad.

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

A smallholders Diary

I thought I was going to wind a Diary. I had visions of a medium sized mole skined, yellowing pages.   However it transpires that you can win a Dulux Ecosense Painting kit. Which WOuld be quite nice, because I have visions of a new bed room colour scheme!

Friday, May 21, 2010

I go walking in my dreams

there is little I like more than scrambling into a freshly made bed; especially a bed whose sheets and pillow cases have spent the day out blowing in the wind. The only thing that could make this perfect right now is if my husband were here with me- instead he is off with 30 scouts camping at culzean castle! I'm feeling pretty rough too. I think the volcanic ash has finally caught up with me, and am achy but worse than that I'm the wheeziest I've been in about 5 years. And that isn't good . The coughing is causing a pain in my chest and the back of my neck is sore -is okay tho inhavr nothing on all weekend so can just chill!

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

I don't Know, I don't Know, I don't Know.

Train journey was ideal this morning. Apart from two things!

I decided "HEADPHONES".  Why I didn't think of this before I have no idea.  I think maybe in my subconscious I like to hear what is being said, despite the sweariness. However.  Train for twenty minutes with Gary Barlow singing gently in my ear, whilst crocheting in baby blue was heaven. 

Except for the part where I sung "am so cold and all alone" outloud.

And also, the part where I reached down and fiddled with the zipper on my rucksack and was confused and saddened because I couldn't open it. As the chap across from me, got up, and lifted HIS rucksack from between us, I suddenly remembered my rucksack was on the seat beside me!

Monday, May 17, 2010

I'll Give So Much More than I get....

Woke up to a bright and sunny day.  What a difference that makes to the horrendous task of waving farewell to the weekend.

The bounce, because I did bounce, down to the station was delightful. Birds singing in the trees, and bees buzzing, and wee Fat Cat Stalking me pathetically.  (She wails the whole time). Waaaaaeeeeooooooowwwwwaaaaaaaa.

The train was on time,  it wasn't a steam train, but it was clean, and there was a lack of neds.  Neds did appear at the next station sadly. What is it about young people today that they have an inability, even to discuss the most menial topics without a liberal sprinkling of F and C.  Television Programmes, Their Parents, People they Like, things they like. They don't even use these word for things they don't like.  They are a inconsequential adjective.  A pointless use of a word which just offends the ears.

Anyways. Arrived safely ensconced in my crochet I can block out most sounds.

Delighted to see Blonde and Blonder were looking stunning today. Blonde has gone dark, which means my name for them is pointless, but give her a couple of weeks. The orange skin and brown feet look much better with blonde.   Blonder was amazing this morning. I reckon she must have had 3 hairpieces on.  She was more hair than she was body.


Oh - And I forgot yesterday to show you the treasure.... hence today's photo.

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Today this could be, the best Day Of Our Life

Well, this weekend possibly could have been. 

I caught up with old friends.

Enjoyed a coffee at an outside cafe with the one that I love.  Browsed a new deli in town, which is EVERYTHING a new deli should be.

Had a Reiki session to blow away all Reiki Sessions.

Slept late on Sunday. Had breakfast prepared for me by my son and girlfriend.

Bimbled down to Train Station with my whole family to watch a steam train

Was entertained by Fat Cat pretending that she was going to chase a crow, and even more entertained by Crow pretending to be intimidated by her (not).

Then went on a treasure hunt, courtesy of Geocaching. Non entirely sure of the purpose or point, other than for fun.  We found the closest one to us. However it took a big glass of wine (see right) before I was brave enough to scramble about on the ground to the absolute horror of my kids.  (My husband doesn't mind these things, I act weird all the time, he is used to it).  I was delighted to find it, and even more delighted to find more clues around the town.  I can see I'm going to be busy.

Thursday, May 13, 2010

I want to sleep with common people like you.

So, same carriage this morning. 

Pretty Blonde Pregnant lady I have seen since before she was pregnant was there.  She is very pretty like a doll.  Very white hair, and her make up always immaculate and pink.  She is like china, and getting bigger by the minute.

Sitting next to me this morning, were 2 neds.  I call them neds, because they had shell suits on and flattened down, gelled hair. 

Their conversation was astounding.  One of the lads, possibly the better looking of the two, kepts getting texts.  They were guessing who it might be, before they looked, and then laughing hysterically when they were both wrong.  When they identified the texter, they then reminisced about where and when they "pumped" her.  Both of them appear to have "pumped" the same girls quite often.  One of them even "pumped" one of the girls on a bench, in a park, whilst another friend watched, albeit from a distance while the lesser good looking of the two squealed at him, (i have to say squealed because that is how he spoke on the train), "this is how it's done mate".  He actually provided actions too. 

I didn't count their sweary words, because to be honest. The doors hadn't shut from my stop and it had already moved into double figures. 

They are both apprentice mechanics. Apparently they have also been Apprentice bricklayers, and before that, apprentice painter and decorators too. They were 17.  How is this possible?  Do they only do 6 months of each Apprenticeship?

At the third stop down the line, I froze. A young school girl got on. White socks, black shoes, uniform the lot.  I begged in my mind for her to turn the opposite direction - head for first class to the left, instead of baggage class like me.  I figured the two of them would get stuck in about slagging her the minute they clocked her.

She turned towards me. I saw the better looking ned look up, and smirk and nod to his mate.  And my heart sunk. Did this little girl deserve to hear what I had been hearing.  (Come to think of it, did I?)  She sat down beside me, and unbelievably, their conversation toned down. I actually think they were trying to impress her, with their knowledgeable chat about mechanics and working for a qualification.

I was so grateful, I said thank you to her when I got off the train.  I said "i was so worried you would sit down and they would abuse your ears, but they actually acted with a bit of respect".

Thank you !

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

And We're Rolling, Rolling, Rolling down the Rive.

I changed carriages today.

Mainly because I didn't want the harassment of the 8 school kids who are travelling outwith their placement zone to attend the good school where I live, and in doing so ruining it's reputation in a 7 minute journey.  I only have to tolerate them for 3 minutes, but the language and behaviour to each other, and other travellers is intolerable.  I reported them to the head teacher last week, who replied that he would "endeavour" to identify them.  It's easy. Look at the placement requests, pull out all the pupils from Nowhere Land, and rip in to them.

My new carriage was lovely.  I got a window seat - reverse to direction, but that doesn't matter to me.  Across from me empty.  Diagonally opposite, a professor I think.  He had a book of Fossils.  The fact that he had fallen asleep while reading it, suggests maybe not a professor, but a student. A mature student, influenced by Ross in Friends (poor choice), and deciding late in life to become a love-lorn paleontologists.  He disembarked at the Airport. Maybe he was going on a trip to dig up some fossils. Maybe he was going to a dig, like Sam King in Jurassic Park?

When Professor got off, a Film Director got on.  He was fascinated by make-up lady, but not distracted enough, not to pull out his copy of "A Street Car Named Desire", with all his notes attached, wave it around in the air, so that we all recognised him for the artist he was, and then put it away again.  The real star of this carriage was make up lady.

Sitting on the same side as me, a young girl, who got on bereft of make-up. I have to say she looked pretty rough. But then, to my amazement, she pulled from her massive bag, toner, and toned.  Moisturiser and Moisturised.  Then a stream of make-up, proud of any counter, and completely transformed herself.  The effort however had been put to waste, when she stood up and her skirt was stuck to the waistband of itself.

Across from me on the opposite side of the train, a lady watched me sewing.  I could see her, because she was watching my hands.  It is so lovely that doing something that occupies people with your hands, allows you to examine what is going on around you, without "intruding" as it were.

She was watching the make-up artist with fascination.   A chap who had been sitting opposite her, with his sterling silver flask, harrumphed at the make-up putting on, and stood and moved to a newly empty seat. Looked down his nose at everyone, supped some of his home made coffee, which was obviously far superior to Costa, Nero or Coffee and Co, we rarely see Starbucks down here), and then picked up a Daily Record and began to read.  You just let yourself down big time there big man.

As I got off the Train, I met Andy, who is normally on my carriage. I explained why I had moved carriage, and told him I had reported the offended youngsters to the school. I'm not sure if that made him happy or not. He has a strange way of expressing himself, but I think he likes me, and I think maybe he was happy someone had done something.

I also spotted man who I follow at fast pace, and nodded hello to him.  One morning, after being pounced on by a junkie for a "light, or lighter even", i chased down the street after a face I knew, in order to afford myself some protection.  I think the poor man thought I was chasing him. It was 2 weeks before I saw him on the train again. I like to think he was on holiday, and no avoiding me.   I have explained to him what we are doing, and now I like to think that he is proud to be my protector.

Only one of Blond and Beautiful were there this morning. Not sure, where the other one was.  Blond, is not particularly beautiful.  She is petite, yes, dressed like a shop dummy in one of the "hip" dress shops, handy with hairpieces, and constantly updating the orange effect all over her body.  She is like little Tango Lady.   Her feet are almost dried apricot with hard skin. It is difficult to look at without pulling faces.  She wears the most amazing shoes; i have no idea how she manages to balance all the way to her work.

As I excited the Station, there was Gavin.  I call him Gavin, because my Son decided on a name.  I think it suits, because he is love-struck like Gavin in the TV show.  Gavin is on my train every morning, I'm not sure where he gets on, but every day, Gavin leaves the train, goes through the barriers and waits for Nessa/Peggy.  I call her Nessa because her attitude is similar to Nessa of Gavin and Stacy.  I called her Peggy, as a nice way of saying Piggy, cause she bears a fantastic resemblance to Miss Piggy, in shape, form, and attitude. I suppose I should just call her Peggy, but I like the Gavin and Stacy connection.

Gavin was let down today. Peggy wasn't there.  You would think when the work together, she could at least text and say "don't wait I'm not on the train".  I've sat next to her a couple of times, and she has audibly groaned when she see him.  But her demeanour and attitude don't put Gav off.  He waits patiently like a wee pup for her everyday. And when she isn't there.  His tail droops.

Friday, April 23, 2010

The Friday 5

In honor of William Shakespeare’s birthday, here are this week’s questions!

In A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Lysander says,
“Ay me! for aught that I could ever read,
Could ever hear by tale or history,
The course of true love never did run smooth…” How has this proven (or not proven) to be the case in your life?
 My true love, runs truer than any river.  I met him, I loved him. I still love him, I will always love him.
In Hamlet, the title character says, “Frailty, thy name is woman!” Who in your life has proven this not to be true? And if you’re willing to share, who in your life has proven this to be completely true?
I am frail. I just proved it to myself, by breaking under a bit of pressure at home and work, and had to lock myself in the loo. Pathetic.   On the other hand, sometimes, in fact, the majority of times, I amn't frail at all. I'm the strongest person I know. 
In The Merry Wives of Windsor, Pistol says,
“Why then the world’s mine oyster,
Which I with sword will open.” Ignoring the possible sexual meaning here, how do you feel about oysters?
Disgusted. They are snot in a shell
In The Merchant of Venice, Lorenzo says,
“The man that hath no music in himself,
Nor is not mov’d with concord of sweet sounds,
Is fit for treasons, stratagems, and spoils.” Do you agree, and have you known anyone who seemed to be completely unmoved by any kind of music?
No one. Everyone, even my husband who insist he is tone deaf, and sings flat, enjoys a bit of music, and has been know to be heard to sing. 
Is Shakespeare overrated, or is he truly the western world’s greatest writer?
No he isn't over rated, but if he had written in modern English, more people would have appriecated him. 

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Sunday Stealing

Sunday Stealing: The Meme Time Meme

01. Real First Name:  Helen

02. Birthday:  30th April 1964

03. Where do you live: Troon, Ayrshire

04: What are you studying/What are you working as: Business Administrator

05. What makes you happy:  Life

06. What are you listening to now/have listened to last:  Meatloaf, strangely

07. What is particularly good/bad about your blog:  I don't update regularly, or be interesting enough.

08. An interesting fact about you:  I don't have a womb.

09. Are you in love/have a crush at the moment:  Yes Indeedy

10. Favorite place to be:  By the Water

11. Favorite lyric:   You to Me are Everything....

12. Best time of the year:  October

13. Weirdest food you like:  I don't really do weird.


01. A film:    Hearts and Souls. (If you love Robert Downey, and Want to cry happy)

02. A book:  The World According to Garp, By John Irving

03. A song:  How Men Are, Aztec Camera.

04: A band:  Biffy Clyro


01. One thing you like about a blogger that you have not met:  Elle Dubya - Her Faith is Astounding

02. Two things you like about yourself:  My Love of Life, and my hair

03. Name three things that you need in a lover:  Warmth, Laughter, and Hugs

Monday, April 12, 2010

I'm staying out for the summer

Okay - Amazingly, yesterday. APRIL 10th. We had first BBQ. 

Amazing.  Steak, Sausage, Salad, Coleslaw, Potato Salad, Yummer.

The sky is blue, and it is hard to believe that 5 weeks ago it was snowing. Infact I think it was snowing closer than that. 

Life goes on huh!  I'm a bit sad that we didn't get Nunk home, cause I could have lost a fair bit of weight shoving him up and down the beach road in a chair! ;-)

Sunday, April 11, 2010

So polite, you're busy still saying please

So, Sunday.  

Two weeks now since events kicked in motion probably the most emotionally exhausting week of my life.   Two weeks, which feel like a life time, but at the same time, strangely feel like the shortest time that has had the most happen in it. 

I'm wondering, now if, as my Cous Linda said, maybe my keeling over on Thursday was actually down to the emotion of it all.  I was rubbish.  from 9.30 pm on Wednesday night. My throat started hurting. Two cups of hot water with honey.  No joy.  Thursday woke up - Aching all over, throat like broken glass.  Couldn't swallow.   How many Beechams Flu Capsules can you take in one day?  Many many many, added to that, Coproxamol and Night Nurse.  Oh yes. I was well doped up. 

The Cremation was as nice as a cremation can be.  A coming together of family who should really come together more often, but as days are now, and lives are - we are all too far apart and too busy.  The minister was lovely and had written a lovely piece, and even managed to make me smile.  

South Beach Hotel laid on a lovely high tea. Sandwiches, Scones, Cake and Sausage Rolls.  We had time to catch up with family and old friends, and raise a cup to the Nunk. 

Today the sun is shining and life moves on.  It's harsh, but it's real.  I just did a search with the shiney new Windows 7, on Nunk, and was confronted with a whole lot of images I had forgotten I had.  So, maybe physically he is gone, but in our hearts, and in the bloody computer... he lives forever.

Friday, April 09, 2010

An Easy Opt out

I've had a rough week, I' can't think too much, or too hard. 

Open up your library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player, iPod, etc.)
2. Put it on shuffle
3. Press play
4. For every question below type the song that’s playing. When you go to a new question, press the next button
6. No repeat artists…stuff happens (randomly!!)
7. No cheating or doctoring your list to make yourself look cooler than the person you took this from.

Opening Credits:  I Can Dream About You, Dan Hartmann
Song for a Winter’s Night: Welcome to the 60's John Travolta, Nicki Blonski
First Day of School: Let Forever Be, The Chemical Brothers
Falling in Love:  In a Big County, Big Country
Breaking up: One too Many Mornings, The Chemical Brothers
Prom:  The Mountains of Navaho, Scouting for Girls
Life’s OK:  Beyond the Sea, Bobby Darrin
Mental Breakdown:   Angels, Robbie Williams
Driving:   I feel for you... Chaka Khan
Flashback:   Black Eyed Boy, Texas
Getting Back Together:   Coming Up Easy, Paolo Nutini
Wedding Scene:  Do that to me one more time, Captain and Tenile
Sex Scene:   Bright Idea, Orson  (ha ha ha)
Shelter:  Oh What a Night, Four Seasons
Birth of Child:  Grow old with you, Adam Sandler (that nearly made me cry)
Final Battle:  Adult Education, Hall and Oates
Death Scene: Clothes Off, Gym Class Heros, Ft Patrick Stump
Funeral Scene: Back to Hell, Alkaline Trio
End Credits: I Will Follow, U2

Sunday, April 04, 2010

Baby, Baby. Where did Our Love Go?

A week ago today, we were all sat laughing and giggling over tea, and playing at home with organs!

In the hours that came, just after a lovely evening meal, events unfolded that changed lives and stopped one heart beating for ever.  Nant hadn't been happy with Nunk in the afternoon, and when she left, promised to phone and let me know what the hospital said.  Sadly the hospital had already phoned when she got in.  They wanted her at the hospital and they wanted her quickly. 

We dropped everything and ran, well drove.  We left Sarah (sorry Sarah) in Prestwick as we drove on down to the Hospital at the far side of Ayr.  I thought we were never going to get there.  Nant and I ran in, praying we were in time.   Both of us had a little wobble in the lift, and then again when the auxilliary stopped us in the corridor.  Thankfully he was still with us, and better than that, he was sitting up in bed, giving cheek to the nurse who was sitting with him.   Nant gave him a big cuddle and then left to speak with the nurse, I sat with him, holding his hand, tears streaming down my face. "oh Nunk, what are you doing to us".  He just shook his head and told me that it was time.  That the infection in his foot was spreading and he just didn't want to fight any more.  Si and Steven arrived from the car park, and we all sat with him, as he continually fought with the nurses wanting to have his feet out the bed!

Eventually he settled, and Si and Steven left for the night. Nant and I settled down to a night by his bed.   In the morning we realised that we had to make calls.  We had to tell the rest of the family, but in doing so we knew we were acknowledging the inevitable. 

He didn't really speak again until my cousin arrived from the Isle of Man - only 5 hours after we phoned her.  He woke, and said "hello darling"

Friday, April 02, 2010

But still I be myself, I don't want-a to change a t'ing, Shutupadaface!

Difficult week, but a fulfiling one. 

I spent time with people I love and loved. 
Didn't sleep a whole lot, and said goodbye to a very speical person.
I didn't realise that death wasn't always something to be feared. 
It can be a celebration of life.
And this death was. 
Night Night Nunk. 

The Friday 5

Hello, and welcome to this week’s Friday 5! Please copy these questions to your webspace. Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below so we’ll all know where to check out your responses. Please don’t forget to link us from your website!
This week’s questions are in honor of big goings-on in the United States this weekend (not only Easter, but the NCAA basketball tournaments too).

What is your laundry basket like?
Full to overflowing.  Like my life. 

What in your life is threatening to go to hell in a handbasket?
Nothing. Is only life, why let things get to you in that way?

What was the occasion for your receiving your last gift basket, and what was in it?
I got a "basket" of flowers.  To cheer me after a death.  I passed one on to cheer someone else, and kept the other.

When could you last have been described as a basket case?
Today, yesterday and tomorrow

How’s your bread basket?
Kind of Floppy, well used, and has baked two buns.

Saturday, March 27, 2010

Something in the way she mooooooos

Yes, Moo's.

I think that is a far more profound lyric, than moves...

I am a bit at tens and sevens.  I am going out today, on my own, to meet with people I have spoken with only on the interweb .  My daughter is concerned that I haven't researched them properly and  that I may be going out to meet with a sixty year old paedophile.   If that is the case, he is going to be sorely disappointed.

I know that they are all lovely people, I have seen photos from previous meets they have had. I always say I will go, and then find something else to distract me at the last moment.  I have a fear of people and open spaces.  

I am my own worst enemy and the interweb, is my greatest friend.  It allows me to be open, frank and friendly with total strangers and completely remove myself from personal interaction.   I have always been like this, and people who do meet me, think I am outgoing and the life and soul of the party, but it kills me. It seriously kills me.  

Once a person, told a rare friend that she thought I avoided work nights out because I was scared I would get paralytic drunk and embarass myself.  Maybe it was true, but it is not something I have done frequently, and certainly not with her.   it was only because I seen her doing the same thing repeatedly at nights out, and I often wondered to myself if perhaps everyone felt the same way about mixing in public, and her display of indecency was her way of dealing with it. 

Suffice to say, I am taking the plunge today.  These are good people who are gathering altogether to say hello.  I'm sure it matters not a jot to them whether I turn up or not, but I want to.  I want to be able to do this, go in and say hello and enjoy myself.

I shall report back later.