Friday, October 31, 2008

The Friday 5

Friday 5 go to Friday 5, and collect this weeks meme - fill in the details and leave a link to your blog, linking from your blog to their blog... And everyone is happy.

Among people you know, who has the
greenest thumb?
Here in the little Principality known as Scotland, we refer to ALL our fingers as green when abundant ability of Gardening is favoured. I am by far the most green thumbed/fingered of all the people I know. But this is because I talk to the plants, and send them Reiki symbols. Hence I'm not really green thumbed, but green tongued and green souled.

Among people you know, who has the bluest blood?
Tooliebelle has the Bluest Blood. I think someone mixed her up at the hospital , even tho she is the double of her dad, and I don't really think she was ever out of my sight! She is very regal and organised, but also expects things to be done for her at a drop of a hat. Without her we would be nothing... However Boy would have us believe that he has the bluest blood, because he is in fact the creator of all things. Seriously. GOD was just a subcontractor according to my son.

Among people you know, who has the yellowest belly?
I have the yellowest belly. I am big feartycat. I will not touch certain things, go certain places or speak to certain people for fear. I'm not discussing what these fears are, because mentioning them provokes attack, and panic.

Among people you know, who has the blackest heart?
What is blackest heart, no love? only Hate? I don't know people like that. I only know nice people.

Among people you know, who is the most silver-tongued?
Silvertongued. Sweet talking? Huh? Taking advantage of simpletons? That would be Wee Devil.... Oh Yes It Would. She says Anything to me, and I would be believing her. Oh Yes I would. I believe everything the evil devil says to me, even when patently obvious she is telling untruths!

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Beside the Victory, that's My Destiny

okay- So Tuesday Night, it was the kids' turn, tonight, it's Dad's turn.

He isn't a big one for parties / people / mixing (like me), but he is loving his scouts, and has made the effort big time here.

This is the Beavers and Cubs Party, and I think there are going to be a few beavers / and cubs who need a change of undies when they see the normally v. quiet Mogli, looking like this. I demonstrated a few Raaaaa noises, and I think he has got it off patt.

He was just going to wear Steven's Scary mask, but said if I seen anything while I was out to grab it.

Here be Simon the Zombie.

Pretty Cool. Eh?

I was mostly very impressed, especially with how little make up it took to make him look scary.

I said, "if you come into the bedroom wearing this tonight, you don't be having to do the Doo Doo Monster noises. I'll be scared enough without it".

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Let's Hear those Sleigh Bells Jingle and Ring Ting Ting a ting Ting

My kids had parties last night - halloween for one of them and "superhero night" for the other.

The Superhero night was being held in Church Hall which doesn't hold with celebration of the dark arts. Hence "superhero", as opposed to anything remotely witchy or devilish.

Boy's costume was hired, I just think- this is his last year at school, lets make it a good one - I think he looks brilliant!

Tooli's was home made - the piece de resistance for her was wearing her brothers pants! She was actually wearing his t-shirt too, but the fact that she got to wear his pants was a big plus for her! Strange Strange child.

She looked lovely. I painted her face - oh how I long for the days of face painting, - that used to occupy us for hours, and make her put on a tiara, and then fashioned a cloak out of some beautiful lilac tuille (like her).

I thought she was just perfect. But then she is.

On the other side of life, I seen these two today, they aren't actually dressed up. This is how they go about every day, and they think they look good! Why can't ned's who wear ned clothes realise that EVERYONE in the world, (including other neds) think that they look ridiculous. Did you know that when a ned Puts his hat on, he pushes his palm against his nose to make sure the skip of his cap is at the correct position??? These two both had hats on, but you just couldn't see them under the hoods! bams!

Saturday, October 25, 2008

Ooh! Let me have it.

What do you want?

Lottery winnings? Money for Nothing? An easy job, where you turn up, have fun and get paid?

Nothing comes for free does it? I keep hoping that one day, a pile of money will land on my doorstep and then I will go mad mental crazy.

Extension, non-stop buying for the kids, holiday abroad, NOW, new house, horse? motorbike (I don't even drive a motorbike, but I quite like the idea, but only for good weather). A house in France, a private plane, flying lessons for Si, cars for the kids, cars for us, Once I start, the ideas get bigger and bigger and bigger. I shouldnt' think about it, because then I get depressed, when the money doesn't land on my doorstep the next day.

Friday, October 24, 2008


Where’s your favorite beach? There's a beach about 800 yards away from my house. This is called the North Beach in Troon. On a sunny afternoon - I can hear the jet ski's roaring about. There is another Beach in Troon, Originally named South Beach, this is a cleaner, more pretty beach, with Sand Dunes and clean white sand. Barassie Beach (North Beach), is more shell covered and is prone to the mess of the sea. Strangely enough - this is the beach which is more busy, I think because the folk who come down like to be able to park right on the beach. Barassie is also better for Windsurfers and wind sport because it is open to the winds which come down the Clyde.

Where’s your favorite place to spend money?

Borders Bookshops. I love spending money in there, and Time. I could spend hours and hours and hours in there.

Where’s a good place to watch people?
I watch people everywhere. I am professional people watcher. I love watching people. I can sit anywhere, and watch people and imagine all sorts of stories about them. Work, Home, The Beach, the Town, Cafes, Car Parks, Sports Halls. Everywhere. I have a very over-active imagination and I can pictures their whole lifes.

Where’s a good place to be totally alone?
My Bed. I love lying in my bed, in the quiet. The Beach. I love sitting on the wall on the beach, just watching. Is all good.

Where’s a place outside of work (or school) where you’re likely to run into people from work (or
school)? No. Unless it is the supermarket. I Like to keep my work and personal life separate. I am a separate sort of person. Compartments for all parts of my life. That is how I like it.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

We All Fall Down

I had quite a productive day today.

The wind was blowing which was a bit off-putting.

One of our customer's boats ran aground.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Cause that's just who I am this week

Last night was busy.

Boy was away to See Fall Out Boy, and the very pretty Pete Wentz. Shame that the lead singer isn't quite as pretty - he has the most AMAZING voice. I'd have gone and seen them. (But that wouldn't be cool).

Tool was at Guides, and it was my turn!!! Oh Joy. My turn, that is to be Adult assistant, and guess what, I agreed to be Cook at the December camp. ha ha ha ha ha What a giggle. Tool is mortified, she thinks (a) I'm going to poison everyone or (b) totally embarass her by not being able to cook. Tee hee It was actually okay - I watched as the girls drew things, and talked about things, and then sat to one side as they did some singing.. (no way was I doing that). Then they played games, and I was right into that, screaming encouragement ... and cheating.

Then they did...... what did they do? I can't think. But that was it. All done, and I got to go home.

Si went away to pick Boy up - we didn't want him and pal struggling to get home and having to leave concert early, but then Si got stuck in diversion and ......didn't get home for ages and ages and ages.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Fling my arms around you as we fall in ecstacy

Sometimes, I wish that I could live in a little bubble of my own, but that's not possible.

So I have returned to work today. Wowser.

So much paper. So little time.

Well actually all the time in the world if I'm honest.

So I thought, I wee picture of gary would make me feel better, and you know what? Actually, it has.

Monday, October 20, 2008

I really wanna know....who are you you you

Me and Boy had a whale of a time today.

The Sixth Years hold a Fancy dress party for the 1st Years next Tuesday.

So we went to select an outfit for it.

I have never laughed so much in my life. It was so funny.

It is the best thing - I would love to work in there.

I just kept bringing outfits out for Boy to try on .ha ha ha ha.

I'm thinking maybe I was enjoying it more than him.

We got him one eventually.... it's not here, but he will be SPECTACULAR!

Sunday, October 19, 2008

I want the World to know.....

We took Si out for Tea Tonight... It has to be a quiet affair, cause Si doesn't like attention drawn to (a) him, or (b) the fact that he is older than he was on Friday.

I bought him a Cocktail to celebrate, a Frankie and Benny's "PS I love You", cause I do. he received this gratefully and told us that if we had tried to do something embarassing then he would get up and leave....

When we ordered Pudd, Si was at the loo, as was Tooli, and the waitress asked us if we would like a candle in Si's Pudd. Well How Could We Resist???

The two of them came back from the toilet, and it was all me and Boy could do to not snigger and give the game away.

We maneuvered the seating so that Si was trapped to the back of the table - and wouldn't be able to escape, and then we watched on in excited horror, as the lights dimmed and the waffle came towards him with Happy Birthday and Congratulations Blaring out over the restaurant. he couldn't escape... he was stuck!

But Look at his face... He loved it, he said he was mad, but he so wasn't, boy and me had tears streaming down our faces....

Saturday, October 18, 2008

May All Your Dreams Come True.........

Happy Happy Birthday, from Little Ole Me to You!

Is my Babe's Birthday Today!

Happy 28th Babes.

Friday, October 17, 2008

Friday 5


Who frightens you?

Wee Devil scares the shit of out me.

Seriously. She is Mental, with a VERY big C
apital M. You never know when she is telling the truth, or lying, in fact there is a very fine line between the two with Wee-Devil everything she says could be the truth, and everything could be a lie.

Very very unpredictable and being around her for an extended period in time means that you start to be a bit scary mental too.

Who regularly surprises you?
Wee-Devil. I receive letters and packages from her at sometimes an alarming rate - all of which are a delight and make me laugh hysterically.

Where she gets her inspiration from is unknown, but you can guarantee if a package ar
rives for me at work, I try and leave it as long as possible to make the anticipation play out and I can fully enjoy the surprise

Who calms you down?
My Si, without fail.

Any time I am stressed or freaking (which is
actually quite often), a hand on my back, on my knee, a cuddle anything, and everything is better.

Who inspires you?

My Kids!

They can do anything, and make me want to do better just so that I could be better for them.

Who admires you perhaps more than he or she should?
Does Anyone? I don't think so, I don't do very much to generate much admiration. I'm not being modest, but I'm not know for inspirational works.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Can't forget you only get what you give

. T

So we all managed to drag ourselves out of our pits this morning...

Si ran downstairs first to check the traps, which had worked!

One Deid Moose. Waaaaaaa. Can't bear the thought
of it. A Cat would have been so much kinder!

Anyways. off we set - Boy to Volleyball, yet again.... that is six days straight, and Tool and Moi to Blair Drummond Safari Park.

As you can see, it was a lovely day for it.

These are only a selection of LOADS of photos we took. The Sun was shining, the animals looked pretty happy.

I wasn't entirely sure about the elephants, there were three of them, and all three looked pretty grey, but I suppose unless they were bouncing around in the jungle with a whole herd, I don't suppose they are going to be REALLY happy.

We were there for 3 full hours, and could have happily spent more time there.

We didn't get to Monkey or Chimpanze Island, which involved a boat trip. The queue for the boat was overflowing with kids
from a special home - there seemed to be bus loads of them there. So we left them to the spaces, and got on with looking at the animals which were around and about.

Plenty to see as you can see from the photos.

We left, after one last trip around the drive thru - the lions are so spectacular, it would be nice just to park there , it really would, But I'm not sure about your safety. I suppose they would come and investigate eventually, but they really don't seem to care about you driving about. I would quite have liked it tho - if they'd taken a wee jump on top of the car. That would have been brill!

Anyhoos- we got in the car and drove back to Wishaw....I had a hard job remembering which way to go. I decided to drop into Glasgow City Centre to get Si a present, and as we pulled up at George Square, WHAM - we got belted in the back. O M G I thought My head had fallen off. I had no idea what had happened.

I checked Tool who was sitting looking stunned, and checked Boy who -was actually out the car. The poor lad in the White Van behind looked horrified, but not as puzzled as me when I realised that there was absolutely no damage.

Poor Soul! Anyhoos - we are okay. all a bit stunned but home!

And So We Face The Final Curtain

Moose No Mowar.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

There's a Moose Loose About This Hooose

Look. mice eat tunnock's tea cakes. This one, jumped on the table, knocked the box of tea-cakes out, got one, and half ate it.

1. Not impressed that someone uninvited ate my tea-cake
2. Quite scared that a mouse was able to eat quite as much.
3. Wondering now what bloody size this mouse is

And decided to create a dream come true

I wake in the mornings and switch on Shopping Channels. (Only this week, cause I'm on holiday)

I'm really not intending to buy anything, but I can't believe that these people sit here day in day out selling pap. The thing is they sell Pap so earnestly. It is amazing. Breathtaking brilliance, Stunning clarity, Brazilian fire Opal.... what is Brazilian Fire Opal? Do I honestly think I would want to wear one? nah, i think not. A second a go, there was a Dog Training Session on DVD which can turn your dog from a treat eating spoilt mutt, into the dog of your dreams. Dog of My dreams will always be a dog of my freams. I'm allergic to dogs. and I won't ever be getting one. Maybe a kitten? Maybes aye, but if Si has his way... it'll be a no.

Boy is headed off to training again this moring. He is totally knackered. Running around for 5 hours each day - plus an hour and a half travelling each way. He wants to go out tonight with his mates and I feel reluctant to stop him but am so worried about his physcial strength. I suppose when we get to Friday he can sleep all day if he wants.

Today Si is running him.... and coming back. One of his pals is dropping him off tonight. So maybe we will do something later today.. even if it is a walk thru the garden centre.

Si and Tool did Lunch yesterday, so I don't think we'll do lunch, but maybe a cream tea?

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

I didn't see you not looking when I messed up

So yesterday was all great, and I was feeling positive.

Today not so.

I appear to have upset people, without realising it. And for this I'm sorry.

I cant' seem to juggle people and places easily.


Monday, October 13, 2008

Here Comes the Rain again, falling from the Stars

Am on holiday.

Am very pleased! Am feeling very positive and upbeat - things are looking good.

10th October passed without event, which we can only be grateful for. In our history 10 October is not good - however, I think since we discovered the link, we broke the chain, so maybe is okay again.

Si is taking boy to Coltness for training. I lay in bed, a bit stupored from a nice bottle of red, as recommended on "Something for the Weekend". Spent a bit more, enjoy a bit more, and I did.

Yesterday I made more chocolate mousse. Si says I didn't put enough Turkey into it. Ah Well, I can always make it again, it really doesn't take too much effort. I also made Sweet Potato and Riccotta Filo Parcels. It should have been Spinache, but (a) I didn't have any and (b) I prefer sweet potato. They look cute. I had one last night and I think it was okay. Si doesn't really like sweet potato as much as I do so his comments were kinda neutral.

So I'm away off up stairs to tidy Boy's room. I have to do this, because on Saturday I turned out all his drawers, and left it there...... Now say what you want about Boy, but he at least stuffs thing in to the drawers so I don't have to look at the mess, but this time I made the mess for him, so the least I can do it tidy it!

Sunday, October 12, 2008

He sings the songs that remind him.........

CAMRA Beer Festival Time AGain.

There was a time, 6 years ago, when the Sprogs were 11 and 8 respectively, when this was our ONE day out a year, and boy did we milk it. Si and me have never been BIG go-er outers, but this was always a nice afternoon. If A little tiddly.

Today we were asked by Tool not to go in the middle of the Afternoon cause her friends were here, and obviously to have parents going out to pub in middle of afternoon wouldn't be good. So we waited and eventually were allowed to go at 5.15 (whatever happened to the Adults being in charge).

Please to say when we arrived, plenty of ale still available. In previous years there has been a early closing - and we normally manage to obtain last pint, which is quite a thrill - if a bit dangerous cause the serious drinkers would prefer that someone who cared what they are drinking got it.

Anyways - we actually left BEFORE it ended amazingly, and there was still beer left. I had drunk enough to know that any more and it would be coming out my ears, AND i could still stand! Way Hay on two counts! I must be getting old and sensible.

Weirdest thing was the band. I recognised one chap from school - a very quiet guy who I don't think i EVER spoke to in the history of the world. When they started playing I recognised another... and got to chat to him during one of their intervals. He told me who the singer was and i nearly died. The guy was a terror at school, and why he was now in a band with these two other guys is beyond me. I described it to Si in terms of the Populars, and the Alties, Emo's and the Neds which the kids use now to categorise themselves to explain how weird it was to see them all together.

My lasting memory of this guy was one evening when I was 12, or 13 at most, was him asking me, most earnestly, in the middle of a converation "and how is your vagina this evening hel".


Thursday, October 09, 2008

This is an invitation, across the nation,

The Friday 5.....

Actually Last weeks, butI'm doing it now. (Not Completely Finished but getting there)

Under what conditions are you most likely to cause injury to yourself?

What named mountain is nearest where you are right now?
  • Goatfell - I live in Goatfell View. However, you can only see it, if you stand on the edge of the bath,on one leg and lean out and squeeze your head in the very small space of the bathroom window....... Hmmm. I think they build more houses AFTER Goatfell View. Behind it, and in front of Goatfell!

When did you last eat something with coconut in it?
  • I was going to say last night, cause I was eating Tunnocks Tea Cakes...... How ever, it would have been if I had been eating Tunnocks Snowballs. Which I wasn't. So Coconut....mmmmmm Sweet Potato and Coconut Soup. That would be it.

Who’s getting on your nerves?
  • Everyone is getting on my nerves. I need my holidays. I'm off work for a week, next week, and it's been a struggle to get to this point.

Somewhere, somebody is asking him- or herself whatever happened to you. Who is it?

Wednesday, October 08, 2008

What are you doing sunday baby????

Thinking how great it will be, that I'm not at WORK!!!!!!!

Monday, October 06, 2008

You know you got me spellbound what else can it be

I coloured my hair at the weekend. My roots were atrocious

This is the stage waiting for me to take my place in the spotlight for the Comedy Show.

This is the boys waiting for me to take to the stage. They were very excited!

This is Tooli looking at me, and saying "mum, you aren't going on Stage, you idiot"

This is the Scene of the Last Supper. Not the one you know about. My last supper, before I moved away from home and on to the land of Student parties and non-stop drinking!

Gotta Get Thru This

monday again.

However today is good.

This is my last monday for 3 weeks. Yes, I am off for 1 week and 1 day. So no more Monday's until 27th October. Bloody Hell, that is even better when I write it down.

Sunday, October 05, 2008

But the Touch of Your Hand......

I was working today.

I don't mind working Sundays - you always managed to get so much done, and there isn't the constant interruptions of a weekday.

I was finishing early too, cause I was going thru to Edinburgh, with the whole gang to watch Russell Howard, who was quite quite brilliant!

Was quite funny, because initally Si and Boy were going, and then Me and Tool thought we would like to go too, but we didn't have seats together. So we were waving to them across the rows. A couple came in with a gang of friends, and sat beside me and Tool, and the boys got their friends. I asked the chap beside me if he would like to sit beside his friends, but he was most insistant that no - he didn't. I think he wanted peace and quiet and romantic evening with girlfriend. Hey Ho - Such Is Life.

He was very good, as was his warm up .... strange I wasn't expecting that. But Russell had me in tears - his humour is just so enthusiastic, childlike and warm... even with the swearing which was minimal. Tool was sitting beside me giggling away like a looney. We had a ball.

Saturday, October 04, 2008

Humidity is rising - Barometer's getting low

Saturday Morning. Tool scheduled to be playing Hockey.

We all rise at 8 am, and look at the pouring rain and listen to the howling wind. We watch the trees bend backwards and forwards, and look at all the windfall apples under the tree, happy in the knowledge that it will be cancelled and we can go back to bed!

Alas, it is not to be. The phone call is made at 8.20 and the match is still on. We drop Tool and her pal L at the pitch, carefully avoiding the foot deep puddle which has formed in the car park .

We drive to Grans' to check for mail and see if there is anything worth stealing. There isn't!

Head back to the playing fields manage to park away from the puddle. Sit in the car for twenty minutes waiting to see if they will come out. Two teams come out and we peer frantically thru the windscreen to see if we could feasibly watch from there. Not a chance.

Get out of car. Realise that tool's team were already out - in the most open, wildest part of the playing fields. We headed over with big umbrella to protect us. Within 20 seconds. Umbrella is history. Within 25 seconds, I am realising that my waterproof, isn't what it says on the packet. Am freezing, and wet. and chittering. The only thing keeping me standing there, apart from the love of my daughter, is that there are 22 wee lassies on this pitch, and 22 on three other pitches running for their lives up and down the pitch for the joy of the game. Surely I can stand there and be cold for 30 more minutes.

At the end of the first half, I take off running. I feel that running will help, so I take off in the direction of the trees. Si notices I am not there, and spies me in the trees and comes and joins me. We are both SOAKED. Walking is uncomfortable because the backs of our trousers are so WET they are dripping into our boots. But Look we are still smiling. Si is smiling. You just can't see for the frozen expression on his face. Tee Hee.

Eventually Match Won, and Tool putting in Sterling Performance, We left to go home. We are all Dripping. Tool hits the shower first. - I decided to allow my maternal instincts kick in, and felt she should be warm and dry first.

After..... Tool went to bed and slept for most of the afternoon - and I had to go and do shopping, but by 9.15 I was in my bed. Snoozing away.

Friday, October 03, 2008

One Life, With Each other.....

It's been 23 Years.

I still remember the whole day.

I still miss him.


1. Who is your favorite author?
Right now - Christopher Brookmyre. Is a very clever chappie and I ADORE, seriously ADORE his books. Dealing with horrors of society he does so with a very very wry humour. There are times I sit sniggering helplessly to myself as I read thru the book, contemplating the research Mr Brookmyre has to have done in order to write so beautifully clearly. I mean, how do you imagine escaping thru
an air vent, and loosing your grasp on the side, so that you end up with someone's head in your delicate areas?

2. What is your favorite book/series?
My favourite book RIGHT now,(and I say right now in both the 1 and this question because I know I vary from year to year) - althought Sacred Art of Stealing, by Mr Brookmyre above has been my very favourite since I read it three or four years ago. I don't know how he does it, but every time I am in Glasgow now, I stop in Buchanan Street, the scene of the first theft in the book, and am transported there. I actually stand there and smile at the scene which is unfolding before me, and yet in my head.


Let us prey ...

The press tend to talk about bank robberies as being daring, ingenious and audacious. They don't describe many as Dadaist, even the ones who know what 'Dadaist' means. But how else does one explain choreographed dancing gunmen in Buchanan Street, or the surreal methods they use to stay one step ahead of the cops?

Angelique de Xavia is no art critic, but she is a connoisseur of crooks, and she's sure that the heist she got caught up in wasn't the work of the usual sawn-offs-and-black-tights practitioners indigenous to the parish. She knows she's dealing with a unique species of thief, and it's her job to hunt him to extinction - though the fact that it's not just his m.o. that's cute might prove a distraction.

This thief, however, has greater concerns than his own safety, and a secret agenda more valuable than anything he might steal. He can afford to play cat and mouse with the female cop who's on his tail; it might even arguably be necessary. What he can't afford to do is to let her get too close; he could end up in jail, which holds terrors enough; but even more scary, he could end up in love.

Honesty is a virtue. Deceit is a talent. Theft is an art form.

The Sacred Art Of Stealing: prepare to be misled.

3. Who is a book hero you most wish to be like?
Jane Fleming, in All Fun and Games Until Someone Looses an Eye, by Mr Brookmyre - (ha ha - this is turning into We Love Mr Brookmyre).

Jane Fleming, forty-six and three years a grandmother, has always played by the rules, never hurt anybody, never lied, never even had a parking ticket. But she's about to put all that right in a very big way...

Intrigue. Espionage. Advanced technology. Clinical violence. Hoovering.

It's all fun and games until somebody loses an eye.

Jane Is a Mum like me - children are older, and she isn't as happily settled as me, - but I know women like her - She fights, often to the death for her children and boy is she good. The basis of the story could be fanciful, but Mr Brookmyre makes me (and who knows who else) be Jane. There are parts of the book where you have a lump in your throat and thats what makes this Spy /Thriller become human.

4. Who is a book character that you envy?
Hermione Granger. She's friends with Harry Potter, she has Muggle Parents who love her for what she is. She is Sooo Smart. And she gets to go to Potions with Alan Rickman.

5. Which book do you wished you lived in?
Outlander, by Diana Gabaldon. Fanciful and Historical. Clare falls thru Standing Stones from 1948 to be whisked back in time to 1740's Scotland. Big Strong Kilt-Clad Men and the bare necessities of harsh life. I spent hours hanging on to likely looking rocks, hoping that I'll fall thru. But It hasn't happened. Yet.

Thursday, October 02, 2008

Fate, Up Against Your Will


Its been a strange sort of week. I'm very agitated this week, but unable to put my finger on it. Last night I finally settled and sat down for a bit. I watched Supernanny and got agitated again that people can be so hopeless at raising children.

Everyone looked on in horror when I got pregnant - I think they thought I would fall to pieces (being of a nervous disposition as it is) - but having Boy was the making of me. I found my talent. I can raise kids who are considerate, mindful, but children for as long as they need to be. I don't think there is anything too wrong with either of them.

Tool is actually the adult in the house hold - she has a timetable which we all adhere to, or she wouldn't get everything done that she needs. Boy could get off his arse a bit around the house - and get out of bed in the morning for his paper round with out the verbal battering i have to give him. But that is a wean thing, isn't it. In fact no - it isn't. Si has to verbally batter me - because I normally fall back asleep after I've made sure Boy is up.

Where do these people go wrong? Last night they had a nine year old who was slapping and kicking her parents and having tantrums to get her own way - proper throw yourself on the floor and scream til you are blue in the face tantrums. Last time Boy did that, he wasn't even two. If either of them lifted their hand to me, they would be on their backs so fast they wouldn't know what had hit them.

I am the disciplinarian in the house, strangely enough. I don't even have to shout. I have the "scary" look. I have been known to make young children cry with the "scary" look. I can detect a lie, find a culprit and get an apology for an unknown act with the look. I don't shout that often, but when I do they know that it's bad.

I do swear. Which isn't good. But not directly at the kids. Normally just at myself.

Last night I did swear tho - but again, not directly at Boy or Tool. Boy was driving home from Tool's training session and took a roundabout in rather an devilish way.

Bloody Hell, did I ever.